Anyhow, on the journey down, I prepared myself for any status anxieties that might occur. Yes, that is our Citroen AX in the driveway, yes, I have removed the stripes from my trainers, no, I don't work in banking/ law etc etc etc. I had everything settled in my mind, hopefully leaving me free to enjoy the weekend as a humble but contented serf. Unfortunately, the one thing I had forgotten about was our tent.
Three years ago, the missus sent me down the shops to buy a new tent, as were going to be camping at a number of festivals that year. The budget we had agreed on was £150. 'Just a cheap one from Argos, Neil; its not like we're going to the North Pole'. Well, it did make sense.
The only problem was that the fancy outdoors shop Snow & Rock was situated exactly opposite our local Argos. I duly trudged into the down-market catalogue store for a quick browse at their selection, but it was no use… these tents were for amateurs. Instead, I strolled over to Snow & Rock to see what the pros were using, just to compare prices, that was all. Within five minutes, a statuesque Norwegian outdoors goddess of an assistant was showing me round the mid to upper range tents on the market, explaining what an extra few quid bought you in the tent world.
Two hours later I return home, sheepishly holding a giant bag from Snow & Rock.
'I thought you were going to Argos Neil…' said the missus, '…did you find somewhere cheaper?'
'Er, not exactly; I went for something that'll last us for a long time. You know, it’s a false economy buying something cheap and flimsy… it'll only break before long.'
'So how much more was this one? £200?'
'Err, no, more like £450. But wait till you see it… it’s made by this hardcore German company called Salewa. Its standard kit with the people that go trekking in Nepal.'
"We're just camping at a festival in Dorset, Neil.'
Besides being impossible to put up, and not being particularly roomy, I can safely say it was money well spent, if only for the tinge of pride I feel when my tent sits in camp site full of domestic-use-only Argos rubbish; if any pro-mountaineers are ever nearby, they'll surely recoginse my brand of tent and count me as one of their own; even though I've never been anywhere near a mountain, and secretly, I absolutely hate camping.
So there I was in the posh family's campsite; having successfully parked the AX in a pool of Chelsea Tractors (that’s BMW 4X4's to non-Brits) without feeing any anxiety, having prepared myself to be out-classed and out-branded with some dignity throughout the weekend, here I was standing in the campsite, wanting, waiting, hoping, begging for someone to come over and compliment me on the hurricane-withstanding, minus 50 degrees-insulating capabilities of my tent. As if anyone would. I'm just as bad as the snobs that drive those high-end 4X4's. I just do it with the things I can afford.
9 Comments:
Honestly, the 50quidder tents are good enough for festival use. Actually the bargain-tents often have names like 'The Festival' because they're good for that sort of use.
That's a whole subdivision of brands, though, isn't it? The 'specialist brand' - ones that are tied to a particular interest, sport or profession. Golf, outdoor pursuits and extreme sports, photography, music production and performance, are all areas where 'brand talk' is often very much part of the activity.
These are the brands that say, 'Hey, I take this seriously - I know exactly what the pros use and I'm not going to use the Mickey-mouse knock-offs'. Trouble is, only the true enthusiast realises the difference if you're after pose-value. The general population wouldn't know or care.
I'm often stopped by random people to talk about cameras, especially since I 'went digital' and often have a recent, well-reviewed model slung round my neck. Occasionally, it's the iPod'n'Red-or-dead specs gadget-freak who's probably as interested in whether the case is a Crumpler than the settings I'm using to avoid flash, more often it's some old chap in a hat who looks like he's probably authored a book on classic steam trains and tells you about his first Leica back in 1965.
'Yes, it is that series of lens. No it's not that model - that one's twice the price...'
Has to be said that sometimes, it's quite good fun to be 'brand recognised' as an expert in something, even if you end up giving an impromptu workshop to strangers when you'd sooner be on your way.
I spend summers in the Adirondack mountains at a cabin with no running water built by my grandfather (author of and lobbyist for the 1964 Wilderness Act). So, I have a bit of experience with the outdoor lifestyle and its odd form of fashion.
My family did not have a lot of money growing up and still don't largely due to the fact that my father pursued work in the wilderness world where his heart resided--something I'm very proud of. So, often we would be the least fashionable of all campers. Years later, I actually found a perverse sense of fashion in my early experience.
It turns out that *some* people with expensive, high-brow camping gear actually admire someone who does "hardcore" camping.
I have a great story in which my friend Foot (nicknamed for his extremely large feet) and I hiked for a day in the NY high peaks wilderness to come within about 500 feet of the campsite at the end of the day only to find that we had to walk 3 miles around a lake to get to the site.
While the rest of the group starts the hike around the lake, Foot and I find fallen wood--not cutting any down because that would be un-green--and lash together a raft with rope from his pack. Then, I sit on the raft holding the packs steady as he walks across the bottom of the lake pushing the raft along and frequently coming up for air.
From the perspective of the campers already at the campsite, it looked as if a raft was moving by some unseen force across the lake with a very soaked teenager holding two large and heavy frame packs. Then, it looked as if a golem made of mud slowly rose out of the lake and trudged up the shore. The onlooker's faces were memorable.
Stories like this (and there are more) have earned me some fashionable respect with the ritziest of suburban outdoorspeople despite my cheap tent, tattered frame pack and floppy-brimmed hat.
So, the real problem is having a cheap tent amongst expensive ones and *not* looking like a suburbanite who wouldn't have appropriately gritty tales of daring-do to offset such a brand embarrassment.
neil
you plonker. no one respects overpriced tents at a festival. you can get a killer spotty two man one from sainsburys right now for about £18. bargain. anyone with a £450 tent is just going to get its contents rifled by the local moody boys.
£18 tent owner.
David
I agree, taht is a confidence trick that brands often play; setting themselves up as an industry standard, or the kit of the professionals. Youre right, in most cases, the real pros don't sit around worrying if they've got the best kit or not, they're off doing their thing using their own skill.
Lots of cheap activities have bneen hijacked by this kind of marketing. Take running. all you really need is a pair of shoes, some old shorts and a vest and you are away. But no, i got sucked into the 'lifestyle' and bought extra fancy trainers, clothes made with high 'performance fabrics', a heart rate monitor watch, and later an expensive gym. You feel you need to be taken seriously by other enthusiasts, so you splash out on the gear. Its a sham really.
Justin
good story sir. I see I need to work on my Golum impersinations.
Anonymous
£18? I dunno, there's a level i won't go under. Did that come with cardboard tentpegs?
You are absolutely right. I got stung. I blame the persuasive sales techniques of the Norwegian amazons at Snow & Rock.
Before going to a festival I also had to decide whether to purchase a £50 "Euro Hike" or go for the more professional model. Being a cheapskate I went for the £50 option, unfortunatly every other crusty at the festival had also gone for the exact same model in the same dark green and dark blue. This was a bit of problem because I could never find my own tent at the end of the night. The following year I invested in a pro model which was getting on for £400.00 and I proudly erected it next to the Euro Hike scum confident that I would be able to find my way home... after a heady evening.
Ashley
you are truly on the level. I don't know if that is a good level, but what the hey.
As the person that had to help you erect said tent at that festival in Dorset, I knew you had bought behind your means - in terms of complexity of erecting it!! You would have been better off with a Quencha - one twist and it's up!
Refreshing to see someone mention inverted snobbery. As someone from a reasonably posh background (and owner of a very battered Volvo estate), I'm often at pains to explain that a big, draughty pile does not translate into wads of cash. Furthermore, to sell up would be to betray centuries of family history.
Genuinely posh people ARE label addicts, but only in the sense that certain quality labels are valued from generation to generation (particularly as their longevity ensures that they are passed down) and that they exist in a less saturated market: Land Rover; Volvo; Barbour... when the original continues to do the job, why change for some newer, flashier brand?
From years of taking part in 'extreme' and outdoor sports, I've noticed an almost ubiquitous contempt for people with "all the gear and no idea". Novices are typically seduced by clever sales patter and advertising (or, in your case, a valkyrie) into buying professional standard kit, without first acquiring professional experience. It's utterly transparent and starts when we're children (having those Nike football boots will make me play better and find acceptance on the pitch). Personally, I find that there's more acceptance in making a better job of something with old, knackered kit. Kudos, if you will.
Besides, with the current trend for arson, theft and tent-slashing at festivals, you'd be best off getting a £15 special or constructing a palatial bivouac from the shocking amount of litter!
Got some interesting stuff I didn't know... cool... my silly site... :)
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