One day this year, I am going to gather every branded possession of mine into a warehouse, douse them with petrol and burn the lot. Jacobson chairs, Christian Dior shirts, a Louis Vuitton bag, even the fancy Liebherr fridge; I'm too frightened to calculate the financial cost of this action, but I know it's a lot. Far more unsettling than the money is the emotional cost I'm going to suffer. You see, It's not simply a pile of expensive clothes and accessories going on the bonfire, Neil Boorman is being destroyed too.
Until recently, I thought I knew who Neil Boorman was. I felt sure how the outside world regarded me because I had spent a fair amount of time, engineering an image. Through experience, I found the best way to understand and articulate 'me' (that is to say my lifestyle, background, preferences and principles) were through the owning and displaying of things made by companies that are recognised as brands. Having these things around provided a source of comfort, a reassurance of my own self worth, and helped to project my identity to others around me. Every object in my possession carrying a distinct logo, and with it a sophisticated message communicating to those that cast their gaze my way. It is no accident that one brand appears next to another on my person, nothing is left to chance. My brand of cigarettes next to a brand of mobile phone next to a brand of wallet next to a brand of diary; a visual equation for onlookers, the sum of which is my branded personality.
Frustratingly, this attempt at branded self-identity has been accompanied with a numbed sense of dissatisfaction, starting as a dull tension during my teenage years, but now as I reach my thirties, a constant anxiety. I have surrounded myself with the best luxury I could afford, my collection of 'things' is near perfect. Attempting to cure myself, I have sought comfort and reassurance by buying yet more branded goods, treating myself 'because I'm worth it'. I now understand that this behaviour only made matters worse. For all the time and money I have devoted to collecting these brands, these symbols of self, I have absolutely no idea who I am. For every new material extension of my character, I become more distant from the person than I really am.
At the age of thirty, I have come to understand that these relationships, into which I pored so much energy, were a complete sham. I am beginning to wake from a long daydream. Semi conscious of my predicament, I have been sleepwalking though life, only occasionally waking to consider why, after devoting so much attention to these relationships, am I not as happy as I thought I'd be. With every considered purchase, I have attempted to make me more like me, assuming this would bring fulfilment to my life. With an encroaching sense of numbed dissatisfaction, the reality is only just becoming clear; with every new emblem of identity I add to my collection, I lose a piece of myself to the brands. They cannot reciprocate the love I give. They cannot transport me to the places I'm promised exist. I am not, nor will I ever be remotely similar to the people that appear in their ads. It is a lie, a lie I have believed in for too long.
This blog is part of my journey towards a brand-free life.
12 Comments:
Hi Neil
Good start! Still can't believe you can lead a brand-free existence after being a brand-junkie from youth! I like the blog format but perhaps it needs a spell-check!
Cheers, Barry
Hi Neil
This time from Gulchleigh, Virginia.
Am I still the only commentator on your Blog site? Where are the hordes of brand-obsessed style-junkies who should be posting vituperative slag-offs about their favorite labels?
Everyone fine here and Gulchleigh lookd good in the Spring sunshine.
Cheers, Baz
Barry
i'm going to start baiting the style junkies as of now, although most of them are my friends, so it's gonna be tough.
Coming to Gulch end of April I think. will call G'ma very soon
you'll regret it. that is until your publishers give you a big cheque to replace all the old shit for new shit. cunning yet very stupid.
Neil,
is this for real? I hope so! I love it!
I myself have been trying to wean myself from the slavery of consumer items.
I have been failing a bit. I held off getting a mobile phone for ages (until last year when work demanded I get one), I still don't have an i-pod (although that would make my life easier) and I try to avoid buying big name designer clothes.
my friends all find my behavior amusing but rest safe in the knowledge that I am still addicted to vinyl, CDs, DVDs and books. Just look at the clutter I still hang on to to confirm my slavery.
what you are doing is most inspiring. can't wait for the book.
M x
Whenever I mutter on about my state of financial ill-health and how I own, well very little, my sister always says 'It's only stuff, Claire. Who needs stuff?'
Respect, Neil. I'm sure it will bring a cleansing of the soul, mind and heart.
Whatever financial gain comes your way on the release of your new book, please use your wealth wisely. Become the powerful and discerning consumer by buying into brands (you will in time buy more branded goods, right?),that support something more basic than the 'need' (desire?) to feel better and look good.
That's the thing - there's good and bad in all walks of life and the good brands like Seventh Generation, Patagonia and Frank Water need our support. That's when we'll see real change - bonfire or no bonfire.
Firstly, I applaud your decision wholeheartedly. I am going down a similar but less extreme path myself.
I am wondering though, what you are going to wear and live amongst, once you have burnt your possessions?
Good luck with it
Nat
Hey Neil,
Having known you for almost ten years and using you as style guru for most of that time (except youre old man check trousers and cheese cutter cloth cap). I unfortunatley will have to part with you as, ive worked like a motherfucker during that time and can now actually afford the life you seem so keen to burn. I need my brands so everyone knows how BLING BLING i really am...
Love
Lee (not the brand, im more Levis, anyhow...!!)
Hi Neil, its been a long time indeed. admirable you are, i sincerely hope you get something positive from it. Vinyl is notoriously hard to ignite, personally i feel you should ship your vinyl bromley direction, i could look after it if you like? i don't think that would compromise the end result? hope you be well, should hook up soon andy
I really like the website and the idea, but it may be a little too much. I like how you're trying to not judge people by what brand of clothing their wearing, but people buy the clothing they're wearing for a purpose. I wouldn't go buy clothes that I don't like, I would rather buy clothes that represent me. Which can be good and bad. Some people do just buy expensive brands because they want to look rich and fashionable, like you said, but there are some people who wear certain brands because it really does represent a characteristic of themselves. Plus, labels are there for advertising, and there are people working hard for these companies that need money.
Have you read the book The Gospel According to Larry? It's a Young Adult book, but your website really reminds me of that book.
no i havent read that book. i'll go get it today... thanks for the tip.
andy, you can have the jon lucien LPs before I sling the rest.
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